Rock Stars’ Secrets Revealed: From Burps to Wisdom, What Ageing Musicians Teach Us!

Younger musicians often lack substantive stories to tell. Instead, give me an aging rocker with tales of youth, maternal bonds, and tumultuous relationships with band members. Many of these musicians, born in the post-war era, acquired their first guitars through hire purchase agreements and later mingled with the upper echelons of society. As a journalist, I was captivated by their unique blend of emotional vulnerability, eccentricity, and shrewd business acumen, with some living under peculiar circumstances despite decades of iconic songs. I found myself particularly drawn to those who either maintained a low-profile career or seemed unaware that they had faded from the spotlight.

Exploring this niche topic was always driven by passion, as I felt a deep connection with these so-called “cosmic dads” of rock’n’roll. This fascination eventually led to the creation of a book titled “Men of a Certain Age.” Here are ten insights I gathered while writing it.

Fallen Prey to Dentistry Disasters

Jeff Beck, the legendary guitarist, once remarked that the typical “egg-timer” facial structure of rock stars—characterized by hollow cheeks and a slightly apelike appearance—was the unfortunate legacy of poor dental care in the 1960s combined with a youthful fondness for sweets. Identifying Beck in a group with Ronnie Wood, Mick Jagger, and Keith Richards would challenge even a keen observer. Beck, who inspired the character Nigel Tufnel in Spinal Tap, also noted that his stage outfits were crafted by Hilary Wili, the same designer who worked on the costumes for Downton Abbey. Despite their fame, these rockers often retain the physical semblances of their younger selves, albeit in a somewhat altered, preserved form.

Their Thought Processes are Grandiose

Greg Lake of Emerson, Lake & Palmer fame once shared with me that their largest concerts rivaled the crowds seen only in wartime. Similarly, Paul O’Neill from the American progressive rock band Trans-Siberian Orchestra recounted walking incognito among his fans in Germany, reminiscent of Henry V before the Battle of Agincourt. During this outing, he encountered Sunni Muslims from Iraq and Shia Muslims from Iran standing mere feet apart, leading him to muse on the potential future conflicts between such divided groups. Many American rock stars view themselves as almost political entities, representing a form of Western power.

Self-Made Legends

This narrative suits Sting perfectly, especially in America. He grew up near the bustling docks of Wallsend, where massive ships were a common sight. During one ship launch, which the Queen Mother attended, young Sting envisioned a future where he would be inside such luxurious cars rather than observing from the outside. His father was a milkman, and Sting’s early mornings were spent in the dairy. His background starkly contrasted with that of his bandmate Stewart Copeland, who was the son of a CIA officer, fueling much media speculation in their early days. Sting admits that he usually drops his native Geordie accent unless he is particularly incensed.

Their Spouses Keep Them in Line

Rock stars often rely on their wives to correct their errors, manage their manners, and handle their business affairs. Gene Simmons of Kiss, known for his numerous romantic encounters, was quite settled by the time I met him, married to Shannon Tweed, a former actress known for her roles in erotic thrillers. During our meeting, as Tweed perused a magazine, Simmons discussed various topics, including British cuisine post-WWII. Tweed, reading from her phone, provided a humorous interjection about the dual meaning of the word ‘faggots,’ leading Simmons to quip about semantics. She promptly corrected his manners as he spoke with his mouth full.

They Revel in Self-Mockery

Johnny Rotten of the Sex Pistols believes that self-ridicule is a path to truth. Despite punk rock’s well-trodden narrative, Rotten’s way of speaking remains uniquely vibrant and engaging. He once candidly critiqued the fashion sensibilities of designer Vivienne Westwood, particularly her use of zippers without consideration for the male anatomy. Shaun Ryder shares a similar, albeit drug-tarnished, enthusiasm for self-deprecation, finding humor even in his own physical changes, such as hair loss from medical treatments, which he openly joked about during a photo session.

Nostalgic for the Days of Sheepskin Rugs

The bygone era of rock stars often featured intimate and collaborative encounters between journalists and musicians, sometimes on sheepskin rugs, where they would concoct stories together over wine. I recall spending several days with Kevin Ayers, a former member of the band Soft Machine, in Carcassonne. He even prepared a small bed for me in his spacious, yet starkly furnished home. Although his manager later clarified that no romantic intentions were involved, the clattering of kitchenware hinted otherwise. Looking back, such interactions might be viewed differently today.

Preference for Female Interviewers

Rock journalism, a field dominated by passionate writers who often conceal their fandom, was traditionally a male-dominated industry. Male journalists sometimes felt compelled to downplay their admiration or directly challenge the musicians. However, I’ve frequently observed a visible sense of relief from rock stars when I enter the interview room, perhaps because they feel more at ease discussing certain topics with a woman, mistakenly assuming a softer critique.

Eager to Showcase New Material

Bruce Hornsby, who achieved fame with his 1986 hit “The Way It Is,” found creative ways to sustain his career, including approving cover versions of his songs by various artists, notably Tupac Shakur. These covers helped fund his ventures into genres like bluegrass and jazz. Hornsby has openly encouraged those uninterested in his new directions to simply not attend his shows. His commitment to artistic integrity is echoed by others like Jeff Beck, who declined an opportunity to join the Rolling Stones, valuing his independence over potential fame.

Thriving on Rivalries

The musician formerly known as Terence Trent D’Arby, now Sananda Maitreya, has always been keenly aware of the storytelling aspect of his career, often emphasizing his musical rivalries. He once described Lenny Kravitz as a “cheaper model” of himself, humorously critiquing the music industry’s marketing tactics. Maitreya even penned a poem on his website dedicated to his so-called rival, highlighting a humorous and theatrical side to their competition.